Friends

           You have faith in these people, you trust that there is respect for your friendship and that they wouldn't do anything to intentionally hurt you. You believe them when they say "I care," you believe that they wouldnt steer you in wrong directions... so you value their opinion. You count on them to be there for you, it doesn't have to be physically, it doesn't even have to be on your time, the only thing you expect is a response... eventually. This is what friendship means to me, now I may have a warped sense of thinking, I know I may even have the tendency to swim in my thoughts and make Hollywood budget movies out of the most generic of situations but I can honestly say that some of my "friends" don't share these same principles and even then, I find myself putting them before me. That might make me a real friend or a complete idiot but one can only endure the tribulations that come along with having someone who doesn't share this same idea in your life. Eventually it gets to the point where they become so invaluable and so oblivious to how you feel about them it doesn't matter anymore. Over time friends have come and gone and some friends have been around for years. Some of us have grown apart, connected by vague and awkward emails. Some of us have grown together, connected by like minded ideas and a passion to continue growing together. I've had the privilege of getting to know a number of amazing people this past year who I can honestly call my friends and I have also lost respect for others. The one thing I've learned after going through this process is that you can't burn a bridge that doesn't exist anymore. To my friends reading this, I love you and thank you for being a key part of my life.  


(This post is kind of perfect to me for a number of reasons, it may not be evident and it may not be clear but thanks for humoring me <3)

An embodied collective of everything I strive to be

You gracefully flowed between my fingertips, politely vanished out of sight, and painfully escaped my mind. You will forever be embedded in a poor choice of words and a piece of writing not worthy of your description. Here’s to everything good about you.

smile :)

:] dont be so serious :-)


:-> ;) :}




=)

So desperate for love...

... It makes your heart hurt. (Just an observation.)

Lemonhead

If someone's hating, you're doing something right.

the Universe loves me.

Two trains of thought: First, It's a very hard thing to think about yourself as being nothing more than a microscopic speck in a massive portrait of all things. Second, It's very easy to make yourself out to be the center of the Universe, feeling as though all your woes are the most important and detrimental. I think the easily misconstrued component is having a negative mindset about events and understanding that it ultimatly effects the way things turn out for you. A person giving off negative energy attracts other hurt and negative people. I notice this when meeting new people, it's pretty easy to pick up on vibes and notice negativity after only talking to someone for a couple minutes. If you're happy and you're talking to someone who isn't, it comes off as threatening. I think to myself, "somehow this person is going to try to suck the positivity out of me and I need to get away from you." No one likes to party alone, that's why misery loves company. I like it when people say, "I don't know why this always happens to me." That somehow this external force has it out for you, cursing you with a life of pain while it's quite the contrary, it comes from within. You are in complete control of everything involving you, it's actually one of the only things, we as human beings have control over. You shouldn't have to rely on something or someone to make you happy, people pick up on that, no one wants to be someone's savior or to be responsible for the happiness of another. If you find yourself getting caught up in this vicious cycle, you can't wonder why those "bad things" always happen to you, you're just attracting the wrong energy. If you feel like you don't deserve to be happy because of things you've done in the past, guess what... you're not alone. If you feel as though the World is judging you, they're probably not. Those other people are probably just as focused on themselves as you are about yourself. You should feel happy because you're happy with you. When you feel this way, you become more attractive to others, they want to get to know and be around you. The one thing I remind myself of, is 'I am an important microscopic speck in a massive portrait of all things and the Universe loves me.'

High Five

Oh Bother!

(Photoshop Practice: Bear)

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Echo

I don't know what it means to be me.
So, why the fuck do I want to be like you?

:)

It's Dec. 01 2011